Satire: Iowa State Students Forced to Take 27 Amendment Trainings Following Initial First Amendment Training | Special Sections






If you liked the first part of the modification training, wait until you can do all the others.



Since November 2019, over 70 incidents of discrimination against targeted groups of individuals based on race, gender, sexual orientation, etc. have been reported.

Reported actions range from verbal and digital harassment to vandalism, direct threats and intimidation. Obviously, since there are some students who don’t know exactly where the line in the sand is, it’s important to make a clear guide to what is and isn’t allowed. To guide Iowa State students, staff, and faculty, the First Amendment Training Modules have been created for all individuals to complete.

The initial training was so conducive and well received that 26 additional trainings were held to thoroughly educate members of our community on the rights afforded to us.

The initial training only takes about 20 minutes; in no time, trainees were thoroughly familiar with the five reading and quiz modules needed to complete. With this track record, participants should be able to complete the other 26 training sessions in just over eight and a half hours. Luckily, we don’t have to pay for the half semester of learning, but we don’t get any credit hours either.

Some students had qualms with the training, but for many different reasons one student was quoted saying “I can’t read that much, I’m an animal science student”.

Other students were disappointed that even though the training was supposed to be mandatory, the quizzes were easy to do so they could be passed even without doing the actual reading. Despite the disappointment of some students, others were enthusiastic about part of the training.

“I did the Second Amendment training so well,” said Saul T. Wang, an undisclosed second-year senior.

The Iowa State community looks forward to having a constitutionally competent campus and is thrilled to see that more rights violations will go unreported.

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